getting surprised

well i just got a surprise or a shock you could say. I got a message from my 16 year old son on my myspace page earlier today. I have not spoke to him in almost 7 years and i have not seen him since then either. It is quite a long story as to why but some you already know the whole story.
For those of you who do not i will summarize it. i had zachary when i was 18 going 0n 19 and i lived with my parents and was not with his father at the time. We had split up when i was about 3 months pregnant and ried to get back together later down the road. ( he is the one i have talked about in my very first couple of posts).

Well when zachary was three i had decided to go to college, with my mom's help i got in to the community college here by where i live. I had decided to go full time and live on campus but i could not have him with me and i had felt like he was my litle brother more than anything. always having to ask to do things with him and take him anywhere wiht me, even for a walk around the block.

so when things came to go to court, at the time there were to be no laywers involved only to find out when i got to court my parents had a laywer. I ended up with no visitation and no rights.

well I have tried to work things out with my mom many times and the lsat time was when michael was born 7 1/2 years ago. well that worked for about a year and then it came down to her wanting me to take michael and leave matthew, my husband to live back at home with her and zachary. and when i had said no she told me i was not allowed to see, write, or call zachary anymore. not even as much as send him a cad inthe mail or she would press harassmant charges against me , at the time i had no lawyer as to the fact my inlaws and i were not getting along.
so that is when i had to start paying support even though i have no right to him.

well i have found out that my mother has full blown lung cancer and i honestly do not know how to feel. I do not feel sad or anything and part of me feels ashamed for that but then i look at how she treated me and think she deserves it.

so this is my shock/ surprise for the day so far.

Zachary wants to meet me at the park near where he is living (the Red Roof Inn), yes he is living in a hotel with my parents. they still have full custody of him.

So matt and i talked a bit and decided to go ahead and tell him we would meet him there when he wants to. He is 16 years old now. so i figured he is able to make up is own mind as to what he wants. as far as seeing me and the boys, his half brothers.

i'll let you know how it goes if and when we meet up tonight.